Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Opening Speech : LEADERS

LEADERS
Opening Speech for 16/4/2014

*This is my first opening speech with PowerPoint slide presentation. So photos I put here were in the slide*


Do you know where this photo was taken?

Yes, you are right! Klebang, Melaka. Few hours before this photo taken, 3 of us, together with another 5 more toastmasters were in KotaPharma company.

Toastmasters from Johor, Melaka & Seremban in KotaPharma, Melaka, on 4th of April 2014.

We did a one hour and half demo meeting for around 80 exec of the company. Demo meeting means, we run a meeting like we are having right now and at the same time, being observed by them; for them to know more about Toastmasters and how a regular meeting is run.

During the Q&A session, an audience asked a very interesting question. He said, “By having this kind of meeting, we speak; so we can become a better speaker. But how this meeting can make you a better leader? Since Toastmasters International’s motto is, ‘Where Leaders Are Made’?”

Haaa.. so ladies & gentlemen. Why you think the motto is where leaders are made, not SPEAKERS are made?


From this photo, in a group of ducks, usually we see it has ONE leader. In this club, only ONE president, it is me. Only ONE Area Governor, only ONE Division Governor. These are leaders, but how about the rest?


I am the leader of this club since I am the president, but in a regular meeting like we are having now, who is the leader?

Toastmaster of the…. Evening. TME.

Let me share with you another two Toastmasters meetings I attended last week.


This photo shows the few minutes before the Triple Joint Meeting started. This meeting consisted of Malacca Toastmasters Club, Advanced Premier Toastmasters Club from KL, and Singapore Recreation Club from Singapore. For this big event, it must have only ONE leader and the leader of this special meeting was, the Toastmaster of the Day, our Area Governor, Debra Watters.


I learn a lot by observing the meeting and by working with her, since I was the Sergeant-at-Arms (SAA) of the meeting too. More than two weeks before the meeting, she already sent the email, asking & finalizing speakers and role players. Not enough by emails, she called and sending SMS for better communication. 15 minutes before the meeting started, she came to me and asked, “Ain, you are the SAA, and you know what you need to do, right?” Feeling nervous, I summarized my understanding, “Welcome them, start the meeting, ask them to silent the phone, and invite President for Opening Speech, right?”. And she proved it by adding, “make sure you use the gavel and knock it ONCE. Only ONCE”, by demonstrated it too. That was what she briefed me. I am sure she did the same thing to ALL role players BEFORE the meeting started.

She controlled the meeting and everyone. And the meeting run smoothly. With 6 project speakers, 6 speech evaluators, and 10 table topic speakers, the meeting was a success, led by the TMD.


We might say, “Of course she can do this, she is an experienced Toastmasters. Advanced Communicator Gold & Advanced Leader Bronze, few years in Toastmasters, visited a number of Toastmasters clubs, and an Area Governor too.

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is not about EXPERIENCE, it is about how much you put your effort to lead as TMD of the meeting. How structured your work is and how well you communicate as a leader.

Let me share with you the second meeting I attend the next day. It was in Kolej Vokasional Perdagangan, in Larkin, Johor. This cheerful meeting, with so many people, actually was their 5th meeting. Only 5th! It is a new club, VComm Toastmasters Club. Of course they have less EXPERIENCE but the meeting run smoothly. It was started on time and ended on time, and the leader, their Toastmaster of the Day controlled the meeting efficiently. He introduced the speakers and role players briefly, not taking so much time but still full of excitement. He played the role as TMD following the standard practice of a TME, and that is why, the meeting was also a success.

So, ladies & gentlemen, we don’t need to be an experienced Toastmaster to become a good TME or TMD, or leader. We are here to practice the essence of leadership by taking up the role in every single meeting. This is the place for us to do mistake, learn and improve.


Today I talk about the leader of the meeting, TME. How about the rest?

•       Speakers – you lead others with the message in your speech
•       Table Topic Master – you lead others by encouraging them to practice impromptu speaking
•       General, Speech & Language Evaluators – you lead others by motivating and offering suggestion for improvement. You inspire people to become a better person.
•       Timer – you control the meeting. When you tell others, they need to stop talking, they need to stop. You are the KING! (The timer’s name was Raja, means ‘king’ in Malay”)
•       Ah-Counter – when you say, “you had 5 time fillers”, people believe that they had 5 time fillers
•       Members – Aristotle said, “Who cannot be a good follower, cannot be a good leader”
•       Guests – Ladies & Gentlemen, we need leadership in our daily life. Talking to our kids, our friends and our colleagues, we need any component of leadership.

So WE ARE LEADERS!

Ladies & Gentlemen, Now I would like to call upon the LEADER of today's meeting, our Toastmaster of the Evening. He is not only can speak Malay, English, Punjab, but also Thai! Please help me to welcome, our Toastmasters of the Evening, ACB Bachan Singh!

The Beauty of Forgiveness



The Beauty of Forgiveness 
Project 10 (Competent Communication Manual) ; 8th May 2013

I asked my younger sister,  “Iqa, why do you forgive someone?”
She answered; “Because I might make the same mistake and need the forgiveness. ”

“Forgiveness is man's deepest need.”
TME, Mr Presidents, fellow TM, & guest, good evening.
Personally, I feel easy to forgive is a noble value. 

But yes, not all mistakes can be easily forgiven. If people said that “sorry seems to be the hardest word….”, for me, the harder part is to reply “okay, I forgive you”.  Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive. 

Before you agree more, let me share with you, some stories that make me learn to try my best, to forgive easier.

1st story, One day, I met a salesperson who tried to promote the scratch and win contest to me. After scratching, believe it or not, I won! BUT .. with some terms and conditions. Since, it was my first experience, I was excited and called my father to ask for his opinion.  As I spoke in few seconds, he responded, “Ain!!! How could you be fooled!!! HAHAHA! Don’t trust him, just leave him.. HAHAHA… Ain.. how could you.…” I then ended the call abruptly. I was so angry because he laughed at me like I am the silliest person in the world! I had my phone switched off until the next day. 

The following day, I called my father. I felt guilty for being rude to him. To my surprise, he sounded like nothing happen.  I knew then he had forgiven me for my behavior. What  can make he easily forgave me?
“He forgave for who I am… Because he loves me…”
As quoted from Darren L Johnson, “Forgiveness leads to love and love leads to forgiveness”

L&G,
2nd story, One day,  I volunteered in an old folk home and had a number of interesting conversations. One of them was with an old Malay lady. She told me that she had lived with her brother when all her children abandoned her. But then, her brother left her at the old folk home. He promised her that he will pick her up later but. Unfortunately, he was never come back. She shared her story with teary eyes, full with frustration. I noticed her activities were limited to her bed and she was looking scruffy. I felt sorry for her.

Things were different with an old Chinese man at the same old folk home, who looked very happy and had so much fun. He said that he travelled a lot; he was a chef in many restaurants before. We talked about food and enjoyable experiences he had. “I have 3 children” he sayd. “ All of them are good, have their own families, have good jobs, very successful. They make me proud although they hardly come to see me” Then I asked him, ”Don’t you feel sad?” “No! I am happy here with friends! My children enjoy their own lives and I enjoy mine!!!” 

Compared the two stories, the lady live with anger and sadness but the old man decided to forgive his children and enjoy his life. 

As Gandhi said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”

L&G,
So here comes my 3rd story.
Two years ago, I broke up with my ex-fiance. I believe that feeling sad or angry is normal; feeling frustrated for the unfulfilled dreams and angry with broken promises. When anytime anyone asked me about us, I will answered them with full of dissatisfaction. 

A friend asked,
“Ain, will you attending his wedding? “
“Why should I go? Who cares if he is getting married?”
Realizing my anger, my friend changed the topic.

I realized that I still cannot forgive him or anyone related to our failed relationship. The conversation happened last week.

Other than blaming others, I also sometimes shifted the blame on myself. It is like, “Why I was so stupid, fell for that guy! Why I believed the relationship! Why did not I choose a different word when we were arguing?”

After slowly agreeing that every cloud has a silver lining, I took all the anger that I was feeling and I channeled it into forgiveness and understanding. I have forgiven him and because of that, I can be happier today. But more than that, a self-worth increased Ain was then realized the he was not the one that I cannot forgive for months before. Actually I cannot forgive MYSELF. I cannot forgive myself for the mistakes I did and for spending my time with him and then regretting it.

Forgive others but most importantly is, forgive myself. Forgiveness is choosing to love. It is the first skill of self-giving love. I cannot change my past that has him in it. I cannot deny the fact that the guy called my ex- fiancé was married last Friday. I can forgive but I am not willing to forget since I believe that my past is the one that shape a better me today. Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.

The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget. 

I want to be a wise person. And I believe that all of you, Ladies and Gentlemen, will live with the fullest if we choose to be that wise person.

When someone hurts us, let us try to meet their oppression with kindness and forgive them, even if they are not sorry. As I mentioned, forgiving leads to pure love, make us stronger and happier and we forgive ourselves at the same time. If we say “HUH! I will never forgive you!”, we will only stop spreading and gaining love, limited the happiness in our lives and treat ourselves badly.

L&G
Do you have anyone in your mind that hurt you before?  Your sister? You ex-girlfriend? A back-stabbed friend? Or any stranger that bullying you on the road while you’re driving? Or a friend posted an aggressive statement on FB about GE that made you so upset?

Let’s start and continue forgive. As quoted from Oprah Winfrey, “Turn your wounds into wisdom”
Forgive, forgive and please forgive. Then hopefully, all of us will be forgiven by others, and most importantly, by The Creator.

Toastmaster of the Evening.


Opening Speech : TIME



Opening Speech - 22nd October 2013

L&G (Ladies and Gentlemen)

Have you ever think, “I wish I have more than 24 hours per day”?
Had you ask, “Why Friday only happen once in 7 days?”?

After meeting a deadline for example, I always feel like, “I can do this task better if I have more time”. Did you experience this feeling before?
So, I am not alone.

Those entire situations happen when we feel like we need more time. I am reading a book, Time Keeper, anyone read this book before?

In the introduction of this book, it has this statement ;

"There is a clock in our walls or the dashboards of our car. We have a schedule, a calendar, a time for dinner date, or a movie. Yet, all around us, timekeeping is ignored. Birds are not late, a dog doesn not check its watch, deer do not fret over passing birthdays.
Man alone measures time.
Man alone chimes the hour.
And because of this, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures.
A fear of time running out."

But then,  I found a quote, that make me feel like actually we don’t need extra hours in our day or extra day in a week. 

“There is a reason why God limits our days. Why? To make each one precious”

It is like a limited edition product. It becomes so special and the demand is high because it is limited. And for those who have the limited product, they feel so satisfied, “Yes, I manage to collect all the limited edition toys from Mc D, the minions!”

Please allow me to read some sentences from Quran,

By TIME,
Indeed mankind is in lost.
Except for those who have believe and done righteous deeds
And advice each others to thruth
And advice each others to patience

Therefore, to make sure that we are not included as a person that having a MEANINGLESS life, we must keep reminding ourselves or others, especially our beloved one about kindness,+ve things, and we need to be patient about this because it is not always easy. Reminding about good things is including, remind about the importance of saving, of reading, or being nice to others and in our case, remind members about preparing and playing an effective role in Toastmasters. And, we need to be patient when people answer, “I have no time”. And the biggest challenge when we remind a friend, not a TM yet about visiting UTM TMC and they say, “I give lecture everyday, so why should I learn public speaking?”. Remember, we need to remind about good things, patiently, to make our life MORE MEANINGFUL TO OURSELVES AND OTHERS

With the limited of time, eerrm.. let me correct this. To save our precious time, let me proceed by announcing our new SAA. Our club needs new SAA, who will be responsible with the club properties. When I first asked this person to take up the role, I was rejected. This person is a softspoken person but at that time, I see him as very cruel. But then I feel like I have a hope when after he rejected my proposal, he asked me, “Ain, where is our club properties? Like the gavel. And, I feel like I want to buy and fix the light for timer.” I was saying to myself, “He rejected to be the SAA but he actually asking Q showing that he is doing the SAA’s jobs.”

So then, I did not give up and ask again, “Please.. be the SAA of our club.. please.. help us…”
“Haaa.. I don’t like this face.. okay la.. okay la.."

And he is, our new SAA, CC Koh Meng Hock!
Today, our new SAA is the Toastmaster of the Evening. I will now pass the control of the meeting to the Toastmasters of the Evening, CC Meng Hock!

Monday, April 21, 2014

Opening Speeh : CELEBRATE



"CELEBRATE"
OPENING SPEECH – 2nd April 2014-04-17

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.

There are three achievements of this club that I would like to highlight.

First, on 10th of March, we organized our own CLUB International Speech & Table Topic Contest. I am not sure about you but for me I can feel the different for sending our club member as a VOLUNTEER in Area Contest AND as a CHAMPION of our club contest. After managed to have the 1st Runner-Up in Area A2 Contest, our Champion, Koh Meng Hock will be contesting in division level. The Division A International Speech & Table Topic Contest will be held on 6th of April in Sunway College, Tebrau.

Second, on 17th of March we had the Mini Evaluation Workshop, facilitated by Bin Yuen, and I believe we learn a lot to be a better speech evaluator, not only in Toastmasters meetings but also as a better person when giving feedback to others in our daily lives. Do you agree with me? So, congratulations to all of you, you make the workshop a success!

Third achievement, we have three new members in March; Norliza, old member coming member because of her believe in Toastmasters Journey, Aisyah, a tutor, an enthusiastic friend of mine, our strong supporter who make us having this comfortable meeting room, the cheerful Prof. Sarahaida. I believe, with these three new members, we will have more beneficial meeting, more fun and all of us will improve better. The more is the merrier! 

Ladies & Gentlemen, March 2014 was so special, finally it was ended by our treasurer, Dr. Zaleha successfully renewed our memberships with Toastmasters International. I believe most of us already paid Dr. Zaleha our fees. For those who haven’t, please see Dr. Zaleha later to communicate. Dr. Zaleha, thank you for taking care of our membership renewals. 

Today, we start having meeting on 1st and 3rd Wednesday of the month. This decision was made after a survey with questionnaire created and analyzed by Meng Hock, and with cooperation from all members answering the survey. Hope this change will refresh all of us, become more enthusiastic Toastmasters.
And finally, in this special March, two beautiful creatures celebrated their birthday. 1st, was Dr. Asiah and also myself. Hehehe..  

Again, the more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.




Suffering is a Gift



SUFFERING IS A GIFT 
Advanced Project 2 : Moral of the Story (Storytelling Manual)

Have you ever felt that God has been so hard on you? Too much sufferings? Let me tell you a story about Zulik. Her full name is Siti Zulikha. Zulik is a very cute, petite and cheerful friend. She loves to go for karaoke and usually, we will sing Ziana Zain’s song together.
Sekebun cinta nan berbunga…

She is not just all fun – a brilliant Engineering student in UTM; sponsored by TELEKOM. To top that up, she is also an active facilitator in motivational camps, that is where I met her. To me, she is perfect! Brains and fun.

One day, she told a story in front of 80 school students about her schooling days.  At that time, I was one of the facilitators too. She shared with us the dark side of her life. 

When she was in her primary school, she has no friend. No students wanted to play, study or sit beside her; because she was the daughter of a drug addict.

Being the 1st child of 4 siblings, she faced a tough childhood. Her father couldn’t support the family; leaving her moneyless to school most of the time. Not enough food made her and her siblings look skinny and sick. The title of ‘drug addict family’ had isolated her entire family from friends, neighbours and even relatives.
At that tender age; not only she had to work to help her family, but they also lived in fear; running from the loan sharks. 
“Hey! Where’s your father! We want our money NOW!”
 “We don’t know, we don’t know!”
But she kept herself strong, helped her mother to survive with all her siblings.  

It gets worse. One day they were warned by the loan-sharks with letters and they drove by in front of their house a few times. Terrified, she and her siblings ran away from home for few days, and stayed under a bridge.

I was asking myself what did she do to deserve this? Why?
Listening to her story made me feel like I was watching a movie. I never thought this was happening to Zulik before. What impressed me more, she told the story with steady emotion, no tears at all. She is really a strong girl. 

She told all the students in front of her about her days under the dirty and scary bridge while making fun of it. She said, it was like in the game, ‘survivor’!

I remember she said, “Please don’t tell your teacher that you did not do your homework because of not having reference book, not having internet, have no time, helping your mother, having a lot of school programs. Don’t give excuses! Do you know, when I was staying under the horrific bridge, I still went to school?”
 “And I did ALL the homework. ”
“But, I never hated my father. One day, before I entered UTM, I heard my father told his friend “I am a failed father. I never provide to my family. Can you imagine? She had to go to UTM with her own money? How can a brilliant girl like that have a useless father like me?” Hearing that, I will never hate my father. Never!”

She finally cried; and hugged me. I know she was very emotional inside, but she said she will keep going to inspire people. In fact, she inspired me too. Zulik graduated from UTM as a first class student. She is now a successful well-paid engineer. I am proud for knowing her. 

I carefully asked her, “Can I know, how is your father now?”

Do you know what happen to her father?

Her father is fully recovered from drug addiction, and not only that! Today, he is an officer of National Anti Drug Agency (Agensi Anti Dadah Kebangsaan).

That impressed me the most. I smiled because I just found the answer to my question. She suffered because God was training her to be excellent.

Ladies & gentlemen,
Olives are pressed to get oil. Fruits are squeezed for juice. Flowers are crushed for perfume.
So if you feel pressured, it is just God trying to get the best out of you! And for Zulik, she didn’t only survived the hardship, she succeeded and…  she changed her father!

As quoted from Quran, “verily, with every hardship there is ease”.


Ladies & gentlemen, suffering is a gift , in it is hidden mercy.